February 2006 Archives
It’s been a wild and crazy week, with no sign of slowing down till the end of this week. Whew! I got an invitation Feb. 15 to be a part of the Amazon bestseller campaign for Wayne Dyer’s new book, and that’s a lot more work than it may seem at first glance, but worth it, as it will get my name and the Recreating Eden name out to millions of people who might not encounter it another way. It’s a real gift that I was asked to participate. The campaign is on for Tuesday, February 28, which will be “today” by the time I post this. If you’re reading this on Feb. 28, go to http://www.drwaynedyer.com/promotion.html and read up on all the bonus gifts and buy your copy of Wayne’s latest book!
Today, as I’m writing this (the 27th), is/was my 52nd birthday. I woke up with expectations that I swiftly realized were unmet, and I let it color the first half of my day. Not proud of that, but I am proud of the way I moved through it, raised my frequency, and created magic for the rest of the day. AND the way it helped me realize some areas within myself that are ripe for transformation. I’ll share with you my unedited beginnings of an article, which was fomented because of my experience of today. Always turnin’ my lemons into lemonade!
Disappointment is always of the ego. Disappointment is a judgment that is made when your ego observes that its expectations aren’t being met. It’s a decision of sorts. What is the decision? As is always the case with ego, the decision that disappointment catalyzes is the decision to refuse to allow Love to flow freely. Who does this punish? You, of course. And others, but only if they allow it.
There’s a lot more on this topic, and I will be writing it out when Spirit moves me! Meanwhile, I have to tell you about a few of my many cool experiences of the day. First off, I went to my new chiropractor to get to the bottom of my emotional release needs relating to my neck. I’m not going to go into detail, but we got a lot done in a very short time and my neck is SO much better! No neck pain at all for the first time in almost 2 weeks. Wow.
This is my first birthday without my mom. I have been especially missing her over the last week or so, and knowing I wouldn’t get a birthday call from her today was a little sad. I did get a call from my dad yesterday, and we had a nice phone visit, and he sent me a birthday check. But I just wished for a little Mama love today—know what I mean? After all, today was the anniversary of a big day for the two of us, not just me! So I asked Mom for a “little something”—a little sign from her. Nothing happened really today that I could say was from Mom. Well, not until a certain something happened.
But first, let me say that I had my Recreating Eden book study group tonight, which was really fun because last week, I asked for everyone to bring me virtual birthday gifts, and though we had a smaller group than usual tonight (maybe some folks thought virtual birthday gifts were too expensive!), those that were there put a lot of imagination into their gifts and I just loved every one. And the virtual party food, which sounded luscious, had NO calories! Gotta love that.
Anyway, after class dismissed, Rick and I went to our favorite fast food Vietnamese/Oriental fusion restaurant for a late dinner. Tonight, for the first time (that I had ever seen, anyway) they had lamb on the menu as specials, and I ordered curried lamb. It wasn’t until we were leaving that I realized how significant that was. For my birthday every year, my mom made me roast leg of lamb, so in my mind, lamb is a celebration food. That part—that it’s a celebration food—struck me right away when I saw that they had lamb specials on my birthday. It wasn’t till I was leaving the restaurant that it occurred to me that me liking to have lamb for my birthday was because of Mom. Maybe the lamb on the restaurant menu the night of my birthday dinner was the “little something” from her. Or, from mySelf to help me feel closer to her. Who knows? But it sure gave me a warm feeling.
I love the way my wise Self devises opportunities for me to examine things I teach about in a very personal way, and observe the dynamics of them in my own life. This week’s study groups were focused on Chapter Five of Recreating Eden, which is titled “A New Operating Procedure: Changing Your Mind.” It features the very important topic of attuning with, listening to, and honoring the information being broadcast by your unlimited God-Realized Self over the input coming from your limited, information-impaired ego. (Spirit, who can see all, has up-to-the-nanosecond information and can see everything. Ego, which is very near-sighted, relies entirely upon the five senses, and only has secondhand information in the form of evidence, which is always stale, since it’s what energy has left behind.)
Even though I have practiced listening to and following my Spirit for years and years, there are still times when ego tricks me into disallowing the guidance of Spirit because it doesn’t fit with what I “know”—or, rather, what I think I know that is stored in the little shoebox-size repository of left-brained information I have collected. So…what incident am I referring to? First, a little background.
I have experienced neck/cranial problems for many years. It has seemed that my neck would go out at the slightest provocation, usually in my sleep, and I would wake up with a “neck headache,” or, as Rick and I have christened it, a “neck uck.” So about a week ago, my neck went out and gave me quite an uck, which I kept hoping would go away spontaneously. It’s very acute and on one side, but seems to affect my whole body. Ouch. I’ve been slathering it with essential oil of peppermint to numb the pain and help the inflammation, so I’ve been smelling like a candy-cane factory for a week! It was bothering me more and more and interfering with my sleep and my work and finally, Monday, I went to my longtime chiropractor (we’ll call him “Dr. B”) to get the magic adjustment that would make it all better. And it did, for about three minutes, and by the time I got to my car, it was back with a vengeance.
I’ve been less satisfied with Dr. B. lately—long story short, he’s excellent at what he does and is extremely likable, but his outlook is not as holistic as I would like and he is not as aware spiritually as would be useful to our relationship. And, he doesn’t use kinesiology, which seems important to me in making an assessment of what I need. The neck not really improving after my visit to him kind of clinched it—time to try someone new. I had someone else in mind as a possibility. I have bought some glandular supplements at a chiropractic office in our neighborhood for a couple of years, and always thought I might try that doctor if I ever decided to switch. I knew he was more expensive than Dr. B, so I was a little concerned about that, and wanted to make sure I was making the right decision. So yesterday, thinking it might just be time to see him, I dowsed on it and got a very clear and powerful YES!!! So I called to make an appointment and I asked about the cost of an initial appointment, and it was $97 (this will be significant later). My appointment was today.
Meanwhile, last night, I asked my Self what essential oil would help me with the “knot” in my neck, and the immediate answer was “Release.” And I thought, “No—that’s for emotional release, not physical release,” and slathered on some more peppermint. So, today, when I went to see my new chiropractor, and, after extensive—and I mean extensive—evaluation and testing of all my body systems with kinesiology and some kind of spinal scanning equipment, what was the verdict on this neck problem? “It’s stuck emotional energy, so it’s no wonder the adjustment on Monday didn’t really help much” he tells me! Gee—just what my inner physician was trying to get across when it recommended “Release”!
Sooooo, he told me he would study all the data he had acquired from the testing, analyze it, and meet with me Friday, at which time we would use something called Neuro-Emotional Technique to home in on exactly what it is that I’m holding in my neck, down to the whats and whens of the stored trauma and then help me release it. He also told me that it was no wonder the adjustment from Dr. B. didn’t hold more than a few minutes, as my feet were badly out of alignment, which he demonstrated pretty dramatically with kinesiology and just the act of walking on them would have compromised any adjustment (why didn’t Dr. B. know that?). I was really thrilled with the comprehensiveness of his approach—exactly what I felt lacking in Dr. B’s treatment. I felt very confident that I had been guided to the right new doctor, and that even if he was more expensive, he was providing far more, and that there is a real chance for a solution to my neck issues.
I needn’t have given a thought to the “more expensive” aspect of things—as I was checking out, he instructed his receptionist to only charge me for a brief consultation—$57! For all that time and testing! What a nice guy.
So, though my neck is still holding some of the tension, I’m feeling better tonight. His adjustments to my neck, back and feet made a huge difference while I was there, and I’ve followed instructions to ice my neck and lower back. And I’ll do some emotional release work tomorrow (as always, I’ll listen to Ashes by Cris Williamson and whatever else I’m guided to do) and use some Release essential oil blend. By Friday after I have seen Dr. Wonderful, I’ll be feeling fine!
(By the way, Release is on sale for 10% off this month.)
Today I discovered—or, shall I say, “rediscovered,” an important component of maintaining optimal frequency, and that is achieving deep rest and letting go of overwhelm (what part of us is it that is overwhelmed, anyway? Ego, the frequency zapper, of course!). The next 10 days is mighty full for me, and I need to be clear and focused and able to channel Higher Wisdom, but the last few days I’ve felt somewhat uninspired and scattered, and just plain weary, not to mention, my neck has been out of whack and affecting my energy level and my general sense of well-being—and I’ve been freaking out about it. It’s for sure that freaking out isn’t a frequency elevator! So today, I surrendered to that. I stopped resisting how I was feeling and just let it go. And I'm feeling better and better.
One thing that allowed me to do that was to make a list of things that I need to accomplish so I didn’t have to feel responsible for remembering them mentally. What a simple thing, and you’d think I would have just automatically done it anyway—yet, when you allow yourself to go into overwhelm and your frequency is lowered, it’s not as easy to remember the simplest of tools and techniques. Another (and I’m not particularly proud of this one, as I’d rather do things naturally) is that I took a muscle relaxer because I had really gotten myself in a physical knot with my neck being out of alignment, and the tension was getting more and more intense, and “trying” to relax was making it worse (Who is it that tries, anyway? Yep. Ego.).
The blessing in the pill was that it not only helped me physically feel better by releasing the tension in my muscles which allowed my neck to come into better alignment, it made me sleepy, so I spent much of my afternoon and evening dozing on and off on the daybed, and that was a blessing. Sleep is a potent frequency-raiser as you go into Prime Matrix without the interference of ego, and you are restored by time spent there without left-brain interference. Of course, I probably could have accomplished the release I needed without the med, but sometimes, allopathy is useful!
In the “Thoughts are Things” department, last night was bitterly cold—got down to -13 degrees, and I had the thought just as I was going to sleep, “Boy—I sure hope the power doesn’t go out. It would be awful not to have heat with it being so cold.” Such a thought while dropping into theta is NOT recommended, for I was awakened at 4:00-ish to discover that the power had gone out! I quickly put on long pants, socks, and got an extra blanket and snuggled back into bed with the pups to wait it out. I’m somewhat addicted to my white noise machine, and it’s electric, so it was a challenge to sleep without it, but I managed to drop off, only to be awakened awhile later by the lamp by the bed coming on. (Before I realized the power was out, I had tried to turn it on, and never turned it back off.) The power stayed on until about 9:00, and went off again for about a half hour. It was later that we found out that the power company had instigated rolling blackouts because of a supposed natural gas shortage that decreased the power supply (hmmm…). All I know for sure is that it made me think again about wanting to live off the grid—well, maybe not completely, but to at least have a passive solar set up, and to be able to generate our own electricity somewhat so as not to be subject to such things. Something to move toward. I really love the idea of Earthships.
One more thing—I participated in “Chakra Play” today with Shondra, “The Chakra Queen,” over the phone, and it was delightful. She leads the group in opening and activating the higher chakras (beyond the normal seven). I really enjoyed joining energies with other folks—felt very powerful. She’s going to have a free session again next Saturday, so if you want to be on the call, just email her and let her know you’re wanting to join in so she can plan and reserve enough phone lines. Her email is: r a b 1 6 6 1 @ y a h o o . c o m (just take the spaces out—I spread out the address so it wouldn’t be picked up by an email address harvester.) The information you’ll need is: 2:30 PM EST, 1:30 CST, 12:30 PM MTN, 11:30 AM PST, 7:30PM GMT. The number is: 712-580-7700 and the access code is 777999#.
Now, back to resting and regaining energy in my warm bed in my warm house, for which I am extremely grateful!
I’m noticing some expansion of late. I had an experience this evening, after exercising (oxygenation is great for higher perception) while I was in the shower (negative ions and the greater electrical conductivity of water always seem to do magic for me), where something that was a real “forest for the trees” situation became clear. It wasn't totally spontaneous—I did have to do some probing of my thought processes to figure it out, but it was easier than before.
What I’ve noticed is that as I’ve risen higher in frequency, I have a much easier time identifying when my ego has grabbed the wheel—and, an easier time getting ego to relinquish it (hallelujah!). I don’t know how universal this is, but I get a very distinctive “ucky” feeling in my solar plexus when my ego is upset about something. Nowadays, there is no way to ignore this feeling, and thankfully, I’m learning what to do when I experience it. For most of my life, however, I’d have this uck and not only not know what to do about it, it would sometimes take me days to realize it was there.
Tonight when I realized I was feeling it, I simply scanned through my day and checked to see which of several potentially upsetting things this knot in my stomach seemed to be connected with. I was easily able to recognize that it had to do with a relationship that I am in, through no conscious choice of my own, and that I am not free to get out of. I made note of the fact that I have felt a lot of resentment in relationship to what this person does that affects me without me seeming to have any control over it. Without going into detail, let’s just say that it feels to me that this person holds all the power and that I am powerless in relation to her.
What I realized is that I have felt this way before in another important relationship, and it’s not her that makes me feel this way—it’s ME. Well, you might say, “Duh-uh,” but as I said, this was one of those situations that every time I thought about it I went a little dumb, because whenever one is in resentment or other ego-based emotional states, one’s frequency is lowered, and therefore, one’s perceptions are proportionally dulled. But tonight, I was able to stay with the higher thoughts as I followed the thread of discomfort all the way from that present moment back to the times I’d felt powerless and trapped before, in other situations, with other people.
I started looking at my anger and resentment that another key person involved in this relationship has not done what I have perceived as an adequate job of standing up for himself with her, which seemed to affect things for me. But why would that make me angry? What is that mirroring for me? My own relationship with me, of course. One can only project and transfer one's own stuff onto others for so long before it becomes clear that the common denominator in all that is YOU.
Though I still don’t know exactly how I’m going to pull this off—the learning a new response and shifting the energy in this relationship—it was quite empowering to realize that she doesn’t do anything to me—no matter what she does, it’s all me, doing it to myself, therefore, I can choose to respond differently and to see higher. Resentment is just a sign of self-betrayal. Where is it that I need to stand up for myself—not so much with another person, but within myself? I suspect that learning how to accept and love myself more completely will be the key, as well as continuing to turn down ego’s voice and turn up the voice of my God-Realized Self. These things may be synonymous.
While I’ve felt trapped and helpless in this relationship which seemed entirely unbidden, and frustrated beyond belief to feel that I am stuck in a situation which I could only get out of at much too high a cost, I realized tonight that the gift in this situation is that I can’t bail on it—my Spirit must have been brilliant to set it up this way—so I have to evolve it within myself.
Ahhhh, consciousness. What a grand adventure!
I’m just loving these Recreating Eden study groups! We had a great session today (daytime group) and a great session Monday night. It’s just so much fun talking with people who GET it! Indeed, talking to people who GET it, at least in part because of Recreating Eden! And it's a joy to hear how appreciative they are of the book.
It’s really cool all the insights I get when I’m in the middle of the study group meetings. For example, today, someone who reported having a similar experience to my experience of spontaneous cosmic consciousness was asking me why neither she nor I had been able to return there, and I heard myself saying something to the gist of, “It’s because when I went there the first time, it was spontaneous. I didn’t even know there was such a possibility, so there was no effort involved. Once I had experienced it, I wanted to go back, so I tried—but what part of us is it that “tries”? It’s ego, of course, and ego is the very aspect of us that is keeping us from perfect alignment.” I had never thought of that answer before, but I had thought of the question before! Ah—the power of an evolutionary synergy, and we sure had created one.
Another interesting thing that came up is that we were talking with a member of the group who is a new grandmother about the experience of having read Chapter One, “Leaving Paradise: Growing Up on Earth,” and having the new baby around. She said it had really affected her to think of how her precious grandbaby was going through Earth indoctrination and she was witnessing it. She said it was unsettling to observe, knowing what she now understands about that from reading the book. (Of course, I reassured her that the child had selected the experience of immersing in duality.)
Then the conversation turned to the “New Children,”(Indigos, Crystal, etc.) and I heard myself expressing an opinion that I had not considered before: What if there are no “New Children,” but simply a new vibration here on the planet—a higher frequency, if you will, a vibrational frequency that is more supportive of maintaining alignment and a knowing of the Truth of Who We Are? What if we all start from the same place of radiance, but the “New Children” simply are not immersed in the same level of density as were children of the past, like you and me? It may be some of both, but I really think the new energetic framework of Earth makes a huge difference in the level of amnesia that these newcomers to the planet experience—or don’t, as the case may be.
Switching gears—another joyful event that occurred since the last posting is that yesterday (Tuesday), Rick and I went to Ft. Collins and he saw/heard daughter #2 singing in the All-State Choir (high school) while I visited my dear friend, Brenda, who moved there this summer from my hometown in North Carolina. Talk about an interesting synchronicity! We have been friends since the mid-1990s when she moved back to Lexington, where I was living at the time, and in dire need of a friend on the same spiritual wavelength, and the owner of the local health food store (also a friend) recommended that she call me. She did, and the rest is history! Anyway, long story short, she found her way to Colorado and is happy as a clam, finding the place is feeding her creativity and sense of "Home." She's into all kinds of fascinating projects and has met lots of interesting, like-minded people. Ft. Collins is a charming little college town and a hub of new age activity. Unlike me, with my Pluto line running atop I-25, her Venus line matches up with I-25, so she is finding her new home to be very nurturing. It was great to see her and it is so obvious that she is happy and loving her new life!
Oh, yeah—my friend, Barbara Rose, is having an Amazon Bestseller Campaign today. For the next 24 hours, when you buy her latest book, Know Yourself: A Woman’s Guide to Wholeness, Radiance, and Supreme Confidence, you get a lot of great gifts, including some from ME! Check it out: http://www.borntoinspire.com/
I just realized this evening that it’s been almost a week since I posted anything here! I wish I could tell you that’s because I was doing something remarkable, but the truth is that I’ve been caught up in a mélange of this, that, and the other. So tonight’s blog entry will be a reflection of that.
Last time I wrote, I was just coming off of the first meeting of Recreating Eden Study Group 1. The next day, was the first meeting of Recreating Eden Study Group 2, which went really great, too. I really do love to get together with people from everywhere like that. I feel like a geezer when I proclaim what a miracle it seems to be able to speak with someone in Europe or Australia and have it be as clear as if they were in the next room, but that’s what it feels like to me! I do so very much appreciate that technology enables us to gather via the Internet and telephone.
In thinking over my financial wounds, and the utter lack of success I've had with tackling them head on, I've been wondering, "What if I have this particular set of impossible personality issues because I'm not SUPPOSED to do things in the normal average way? What If I've been created to thrive in a new way around money and that's why the old ways have been unsuccessful for me, why I have the money issues I have, and why I've felt such resistance around it.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how, if we are truly the creators of our experience, then we don’t actually have to follow someone else’s rules—not old rules, not even new rules—at least, not unless we believe we do or we want to—and that WE get to make up the rules of our own game. I’m thinking of throwing out all the rules about money that don’t suit me. Yesterday, I came up with a nice, quick 'n' dirty list of new rules I’m thinking about utilizing. Here they are:
Julia’s NEW Money Rules
- Whether or not I heal my money wounds, I can have all that I want. Money comes to me no matter what.
- It’s okay for me to be prosperous without first healing my money wounds.
- Money can love me and come to me even if I am worried about how I will handle it—if I need someone else to do my accounting, that is valid and A-OK!
- The only condition around having money is that it always empowers me.
- It’s okay for me to feel secure whether or not I heal my money “stuff.”
- By focusing on the options and freedom that are my motivators for having money, instead of the money itself, I will attract options and freedom, which may come through money, but may come in other ways, too.
- No matter what, when I feel joyful, I am a money magnet.
I’ll let you know how these work for me. Some of them may take my ego-mind some convincing! For sure, they give me food for thought and an insight into my money issues. Meantime, maybe you want to make some new money rules for yourself —or new rules about anything—and see what they bring up for you!
Oh, yes—Rick’s birthday was yesterday. Happy Birthday Season, Rick!