Clearing the channel

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Courage is easily accessed by trusting that your Spirit is always taking care of you.

That was the thought that came to me early yesterday morning. I wrote it down on the little pad on my desk here in my room at the clinic.

The day turned out to be something of a Difficult World day. As has been the norm since I arrived here, it poured rain all day--again. I'll confess, all the gray and excess water has been getting to me despite my new affirmation. (See Dec. 21 blog entry) Indeed, the deluge continued through the night and for all morning today, too. But back to yesterday.

In the afternoon I had an appointment for a lymph drainage massage. Problem is, I was having so much pain in my shoulders (inflamed tendons according to lovely Marta, my massage therapist) I really couldn't stay still the way I needed to, though I tried. Much to my embarrassment, I started crying and couldn't stop. We joked that I was getting my lymph drainage after all. She helped me find a tolerable position and did some modifications so we could finish. I was so relieved when it was over--a sad thing when I could have been enjoying a lovely massage were it not for the shoulder pain.

When I got back to my room, I had a further meltdown. I asked Spirit to show me what I need to do to heal the shoulder problems and I cried and cried and cried and found myself begging for help as I was just too low on the vibrational scale to feel a clear connection. Now, I knew from an intellectual level that I didn't need to beg for anything as it is already mine, but I was at such a low point, it was all I could do. I cried on and off for a very long time and figured I must have needed the release. I realized a change I needed to make and so I made it. It was a painful night, but I made it through with some more tears and some more beseeching. Truth be told, the scary part was that I was worried I would not get as far along in my healing while I'm here fasting as I'd like to.

This morning, along with some really strong inspiration about things I can do to heal myself, I spotted the pad where I had written down the insight about courage, and I saw so easily that Spirit really has provided everything already and that I just have to be clear enough to see it. Sometimes that may take a bunch of crying.

Oh--and here's something kinda cool. A lot of my begging was for some clarity on what was going on with my shoulders and what to do. When Rick and I were on Skype last night having a chat, he mentioned that St. Martin's had put Choosing Easy World on Amazon for pre-orders (though without the cover image at this point.) Woohoo! When I went to look at it, there was a notice on the right side of the page that gave me an express checkout pass-phrase (something new Amazon is doing I guess). Here's what it was:
"Julia's perplexing health." I took it as a Spirit-wink.

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About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Julia published on December 24, 2009 8:15 AM.

That was easy! Ask and ye shall receive. was the previous entry in this blog.

See the Light shining everywhere you look! is the next entry in this blog.

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